The Art of the “Selfie”

I am the self proclaimed queen of selfies. I mean when my camera is placed at the perfect 35-65 degree, I make art. Don’t believe me? Check out my facebook or instagram, I am a selfie artist!  I wasn’t born with this gift either—no my friends, it has been cultivated over time. I have worked tirelessly, some might say relentlessly, to perfect my selfie game, which began circa 2005. It’s no coincidence either—nope this artform is completely scripted, rehearsed, edited, revised and intentionally published. Shooting the perfect selfie takes effort, practice and time. The perfect selfie showcases my gorgeous face (my absolute favorite feature) while simultaneously hiding my least favorite…my body.

Seeing as I promised transparency and honesty, here it is... I have taken and continue to take selfies because I struggle with body disassociation—I’ve often tried (through my selfies) to imagine that the grotesque fixture attached to my adorable little head is not my own. Yet, I am learning each and everyday that my body does have value, and I (because it does belongs to me) should be appreciated. My legs, for example, are great—they are strong, supportive and long. This growing appreciation does not mean that there aren’t things I need/want to change about my body, but I have to take ownership of what is mine. Once I can accept that my body exists, I can harness its power and work towards creating sustainable change within myself.  This is my current struggle—my personal jihad.  Everyday I work to find my body’s value and beauty, things that span beyond its inherent utility.

I’m so glad you’ve made it all the way to the end of this post; what are you thinking? What are you working on? What’s your struggle and how are you overcoming it? Comment in the box below or if you’d prefer to respond to this post anonymously or to ask me anything else you could do that  here. I look forward to the prospective discourse!


For your viewing pleasure some selfies v.s. the full body shot:






Comments

  1. Maya SJune 13, 2014 at 9:26 AM

    You really are QUITE gorgeous too...

    The key (for me) has been accepting the things I hate about myself, the things I vehemently want to change and am actively trying to change,

    I HATE my body and would LOVE to have *insert any number of names*'s physique. But I don't have it. And even if I hate my tubnificence, I have to accept that it's still me.

    I try to think about it like this - it's not a flaw; it's a state of being. A state of being I'm actively trying to change.

    It's a mindset shift from looking at things that I want to change as... active works in progress as opposed to flaws. So much of my life I've viewed myself as a brain that just happens to occupy a flesh-bag. It's been a real struggle to get out of that.

    I'm working on it every day and some days I look in the mirror and I'm just absolutely disgusted and disturbed... And it's so hard to break that.

    I really appreciate you starting this blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jess HumanJune 13, 2014 at 9:33 AM

      OMG, Maya I completely agree. I think that learning to embrace yourself is all about your subconscious. I have to continuously remind myself that despite my desire for change, I am still living in the present. So even if I want to shed 100+lbs that does not mean I should hide myself until I do. the mindset that we are "active works in progress as opposed to flaws" is brilliant. I am a piece of art. I get to actively choose how to define myself and how to create myself. Thank for reading and sharing!!!

      Delete
  2. Amy JoJune 13, 2014 at 10:05 AM

    I read your comments after your initial post and it got me thinking. I've never been called the "big girl" by others, as I am only 5'2" on a good day, but I found myself nodding my head to every word you had written. I don't think it necessarily matters your height and or weight, but has everything to do with your mind set.

    I am about as unhappy with my body as I have ever been and consider myself to be a "big girl". Being short has it's disadvantages....what 150 lbs looks like on me can look amazing on someone else. But, unless I choose to do something about changing it physically or changing my frame of mind about it, things will always remain the same.

    I think most women feel the same, but it is nice when someone speaks up about it. There is a great feeling knowing you aren't alone. And knowing we share some of the same struggles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jess HumanJune 14, 2014 at 6:58 AM

      I completely agree Amy, it has everything to do with you mindset. There are things I want to do better to make my body better--I want to eat better, exercise more frequently, etc. Yet, when I feel insecure, I turn into a hermit. I have to literally convince myself to do things that are good for me. So if I am unhappy with myself, I can not make the sustainable change to become happy. It is a cycle--unless I change my mindset. When I spend time investing in myself and making myself feel good-- I am more likely to treat myself better.

      Delete
  3. UnknownJune 14, 2014 at 8:29 AM

    Ma you are so beautiful and I am so proud of you and I completely understand the struggles with body image. I really need to work on my stomach it is just to big and I am not happy about that. I do embrace it and its all about wearing the right clothes for your body shape and over the years I have learned that. I cant go in the store and just pick something out without trying it on because I have to make sure I look good in it. Just because you can fit it doesnt mean it is a good fit for your body. But I will keep working on me and my body to be where I want to be.

    You like the best selfies ever I need to get up on it like you. Love you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jess HumanJune 26, 2014 at 9:31 PM

      Sonja,

      Thank you daughter, I ma trying! I think while we work on the things that we are unhappy with we shouldn't stop living!! I have friends who literally will not take pictures because they are unhappy with themselves and I'm just like but what about the memories! You take beautiful photos and are so confident in your skin; I need to get on your level!!

      Delete

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